It’s time for that time-honored tradition of swearing change and better things ahead, when all are optimistic about the blank slate before us that is the untouched New Year. Why should the NFL be any different than the rest of the world? (Outside of the obvious, of course.) With 2011 now behind us and 2012 underway, it is time for reflection. For the twenty teams whose season ended on January 1st that time begins now. For the fortunate 12 who move on towards Super Bowl glory that time has been delayed, but rest assured it will come.
No team, no player, no organization is without the desire to change to be better to make 2012 all that 2011 was not. The successes and failures of all 32 teams have been well documented since the players and owners agreed to play nice and made way for football to begin last August.
The 2012 playoffs will not feature Jerry’s Palace in Dallas, Rex Ryan’s yapping, the Dream Team, the continually disappointing San Diego Chargers, or the Indianapolis Colts for the first time since Peyton Manning became an international spokesperson for, well everything.
With that in mind I took a look around the league in hopes of uncovering that one thing that each team most desperately needs to resolve before the 2012 season.
Here are the character flaws, traits and schemes that will be no more.
Arizona Cardinals: To make it mandatory that either Larry Fitzgerald or Patrick Peterson touch the ball on every play. Both on offense and defense.
Atlanta Falcons: For Matt Ryan to learn to throw with his left hand, allowing him to throw to both Roddy White and Julio Jones at the same time. And to convince the NFL to allow throwing multiple balls at once.
Baltimore Ravens: To get their BBB complaint reviewed and upheld against Lee Evans for only 4 catches and 74 yards in 9 games. Traded 2012 4th-round pick for him & paid Evans $4.8M
Buffalo Bills: To offer no more long term contract extensions six games into a season.
Carolina Panthers: To enroll wide receiver Steve Smith in a Big-Brother Buddy program is hopes of speeding up the maturity process. In the absence of that, for Cam Newton to learn to race downfield and catch his own passes.
Chicago Bears: To bring back Matt Forte. Nothing funny here, the Bears really need him back.
Cincinnati Bengals: To somehow trade Carson Palmer yet again.
Cleveland Browns: To find a franchise QB, then to let James Harrison nowhere near him and avoid the Browns becoming the St. Louis Rams… just a year behind.
Dallas Cowboys: To never again ice their own kicker. And for Tony Romo to play like Eli Manning.
Denver Broncos: Quit trading away #1 wide receivers instead building an arsenal for their quarterback of the future… whoever that may be.
Detroit Lions: For Ndamukong Suh to harness his rage in a more constructive less suspension-type manner.
Green Bay Packers: To find a running game to compliment their top ranked passing attack.
Houston Texans: To make the playoffs for the second time in franchise history with a healthy Matt Schaub AND Peyton Manning in the division. (Just a healthy Schaub would be fine, though.)
Indianapolis Colts: To find a cozy duplex where Manning and Luck can spend quiet time deep in thought and conversation. Where Peyton can pass along what it takes to make the playoffs in 12 out of 14 seasons as a starter.
Jacksonville Jaguars: To find a better #1 option than TE Marcedes Lewis, the team’s leading receiver with 460 yards, and for 2nd year QB Blaine Gabbert to find a calming presence in the pocket.
Kansas City Chiefs: To delete Josh McDaniels’ phone number from GM Scott Pioli’s cell phone before it’s too late. To start the season with Jamal Charles at 100% would do too.
Miami Dolphins: To do whatever it takes to win the Matt Barkley sweepstakes in 2013, finally bringing a franchise QB to South Beach.
Minnesota Vikings: To move to the AL West along with the Houston Astros. AP or no AP this team is not competing with the Packers, Lions and Bears so why try.
New England Patriots: To lose their copy of “Mike Martz’ Rules To Winning Football” and put together a defensive game plan.
New Orleans Saints: To never stop passing the ball…no matter what.
New York Giants: To add 4 more games against the Cowboys to their schedule.
New York Jets: To have their quarterback and coach in the news for winning football games, not GQ photo shoots and pissing-matches with opposing running backs. Would also settle for Rex Ryan to find the internal mute button.
Oakland Raiders: To actually hold onto their draft picks and pick in the 2013 draft.
Philadelphia Eagles: To keep Michael Vick on the field for all 16 games. At the very least 12 games with a focused Desean Jackson and keep Vince Young offseason sound-bites to a minimum.
Pittsburgh Steelers: To teach Ben Roethlisberger that it is okay for a quarterback to avoid sacks and throw the ball away from time to time.
San Diego Chargers: To for once take advantage of having by far the best quarterback-wide receiver combo in the AFC West and win the division going away.
San Francisco 49ers: To continue playing six games a year against the NFC West.
Seattle Seahawks: To make it rain Skittles late January throughout the Emerald City.
St. Louis Rams: To not pick in the top 2 of the Draft for the 5th time in 6 drafts.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers: To understand that being “younrgy” is not enough…to learn how to finish.
Tennessee Titans: To have Chris Johnson in camp on time and with a 5-hour energy at all times to find his burst again.
Washington Redskins: To finally, for the love of God, be rid of the Rex Grossman-John Beck quarterback controversy.
